Artificial Intelligence Mediated Censorship: How Algorithms Can be Biased and Cause Unfair Censorship

This is an article that was originally part of an academic exercise. It explores the elementary basics that show how artificial intelligence, via algorithmic bias, is becoming a problem for a number of people who fall outside of the norm, for many women, minority racial groups, creative thinkers and independent investigative journalists. – Eve Lorgen 4/24/2018

Introduction

If knowledge is power, then those who control the flow of information and hence, knowledge, can hold power over others. With the rapid advances in digital technologies, we are in a paradigm changing era of global communications. With these advances also emerge technological means for the control of information. Artificial intelligence and specifically the use of computer algorithms, can automate information filtering, resulting in a new, more powerful form of censorship. Enthusiastic confidence in data science now dominating our lives can be premature. Although there are many valid and successful uses of algorithms, this essay will show how algorithms can be biased, racist and cause unfair censorship. Simple algorithms for facial recognition software, to more complex data filtering systems operating within social media, will demonstrate that algorithms can be discriminatory and unfair. Moreover, these biases and forms of censorship are operating in large measure without our full understanding and awareness. The complexity in which algorithmic bias and censorship is occurring makes it more challenging for journalism to maintain its role as the fourth estate. Countermeasures to this dilemma are offered in light of these observations.

 

Algorithmic Bias

A simple definition of an algorithm is a process or set of rules to be followed in calculations or other problem-solving operations, especially by a computer (Algorithm, n.d). Algorithms are used in a multitude of applications such as resume filtering, insurance and credit applications, personality tests, college exams, search engines like Google and facial recognition software. According to Cathy O” Neil, author of “Weapons of Math Destruction: How Big Data Increase Inequality and Threatens Democracy”, algorithms are often used when critical decisions are made in our lives, such as college exams, insurance applications, jobs or mortgage loans. People can get sorted as winners or losers, despite the unfairness of such algorithmic decisions. For example, because black males historically died earlier than white males, insurance companies charged them more for life insurance until regulations changed racist policy (O’ Neil, 2018). In another instance, if someone wanted to do a job search for success in engineering, the algorithm would filter out women in the workplace, based on the parameters for success in that field. (Rao, 2016) Algorithms are unfair if blindly applied and have a tendency to maintain the status quo because they are using historical data. In essence, the programming itself is biased. O’ Neil explains how and why the use of algorithms is really about power: “… the data scientists in those companies are told to follow the data, to focus on accuracy. Think about what that means. Because we all have bias, it means they could be codifying sexism or any other kind of bigotry” (O’ Neill, 2018). She advises us that “the era in blind faith in big data must end” (O’ Neill, 2018). This blindness is ironically exemplified in Joy Buolamwini’s Ted talk about howshe observed that when working with social robots, the facial recognition software was unable to recognize her face because she is black. The original code did not take into consideration dark skin color. She explains, “If the training sets used to create the coding software are not diverse enough, the program will exclude you” (Bouolamwini, 2016).

A racist error occurred with Hewlett Packard computer cameras in 2009 when, “they could not track faces of black people in common lighting conditions” (Sanvig,C., Hamilton, K., Karahalios, K., & Langbort, C., 2016, pg. 1). This created a backlash of public relations problems and a demand for more ethics in algorithms. Machine learning is part of facial recognition software, but apparently is not failsafe. It can increase the likelihood of racist errors for example, “if this machine-learning algorithm is giving weight to race—without even having a defined category for race—then the algorithm has a strong potential for racist consequences without employing any explicitly racist rules…” (Sanvig, et. al, 2016). This can be tricky because the ethics of a system is judged based on how the algorithm learns from history or its previous operators. To counteract these potential biases, Sanvig, et. al. suggests creating algorithmic testing modules to assess for consequence, virtue and norms.  They petition for a new kind of scholar who can bridge the gap between sociological and technical. Such a scholar is MIT graduate student Joy Buoloamwini (2016). She created the Algorithmic Justice League so that biases can be reported and training sets designed to test for ethics. She advocates for more transparency in what is coded, how it is coded, who codes it and why. These questions become more significant when we consider the ongoing reports of “questionable” data filtering in the media.

 

Censorship and Unfairness in the Media

Censorship can be more easily understood from the description of the five filters of propaganda as elaborated in Manufacturing Consent: A Propaganda Model by Edward S. Herman and Noam Chomsky (Herman & Chomsky, 1988). We can see the first filter of size, ownership and profit occurring in the media as a result of digital giants like Google, Facebook and Amazon. Since 2001 the newspaper publishing industry profits fell as much as seventy percent, while profits for Google, Amazon and Facebook soared. According to New York Times journalist Jonathon Taplin, “Billions of dollars have been reallocated from creators of content to owners of monopoly platforms. All content creators [who are] dependent on advertising must negotiate with Google or Facebook as aggregator, the sole lifeline between themselves and the vast internet cloud.” (Taplin, 2017). With the upsurge in fake news filtering agendas, digital monopolies like Facebook and Google are on the cutting edge of algorithm based data filtering technologies, yet ethical issues persist with their “black box” opacity tactics (Boyarsky, 2017). The troubling issue with these search engine filtering algorithms is that they are rarely transparent about who or what is really being filtered. Many web sites caught in the front lines of these filtering agendas discovered a drastic reduction in web traffic from April to July of 2017 when Googleupdated their search engine algorithms to filter out access to “low-quality, conspiracy theories and fake news” web sites (Damon, 2017). In July of 2017, many “left-wing” and alternative web sites had sharp declines of up to 70 percent in their web site traffic” (Damon, 2017). Alternative media web sites like Freeman TV for example, was hit in this filtering campaign (Personal communication with Freeman, December 29, 2017). World Socialist website was also singled out and according to Damon, this is deliberately done to “[assail] political news and opinion web sites that challenge official government and corporate narratives” (Damon, 2017). Such censorship behaviors appear to fall into the fourth filter category of “flak and enforcers” in Herman and Chomsky’s propaganda model. In addition, an insidiousness to the algorithm filtering technology exists, in such a way that many who are being targeted for censorship are unaware of it until they realize a loss in internet visibility, often within a short period of time. David Icke, a conspiracy researcher in the United Kingdom, reports a social media censorship called “ghost banning” (Icke, 2018). He quotes former UK Ambassador Craig Murray, a recent target of ghost banning: “I never heard of ghost banning until I was ghost banned from Twitter. [The idea that]they censor you without you realizing you are censored. People are no longer notified of tweets when posting, it only turns up on Twitter line of followers who are online at the time of tweeting” (Icke, 2018). The reason Murray believes he is being censored, says Icke, is because he now speaks out about corruption in high places. Icke explains, “The goal is to deny offending web site(s) traffic until it disappears from public view. It has the effect of the tagged web site to be present yet invisible in plain sight but the user is unaware” (Icke, 2018). Alternative news outlets are, according to Icke, prime targets of ghost banning on social media cites like Reddit, Facebook and Twitter.

In November of 2016 an organizational study called PropOrNot carried out a news filtering sweep to find pro-Russian propaganda (Boyarsky, 2017). Over 200 media outlets were blacklisted as “pro-Kremlin”, spanning from left to right on the political scale, and Truthdig, an independent news site, was unfairly precluded among them. Boyarsky maintains that, “the threat of censorship is especially worrisome now that the search for fake news is becoming automated”. He also argues that “determining the difference between muckraking (another term for media’s watchdog role) and fake news is too difficult for even the smartest of artificial intelligence”(Boyarsky, 2017). One has to wonder if the PropOrNot “study” was in part, an example of the fifth filter of propaganda, aka the anti-communism ideology at work.

 

Countermeasures to Algorithmic Bias and Censorship

With censorship as well as algorithmic bias, the complaint is often a lack of transparency with the coding itself. The complexity of artificial intelligence can be a viable reason for the opacity issues surrounding algorithms. A call for ethical oversight is paramount regardless of the complexity of computer programming. A suggestion of countermeasures is listed below:

  • Transparency of who, what and why of coding and algorithmic testing (Buolamwini, 2016)
  • Develop practical algorithmic training modules that test for ethics of virtue, consequence and norm (Sandvig. et. Al., 2016)
  • Professional scholars who can bridge the gap between sociological and technological for ethical oversight (Sandvig, et. al., 2016)
  • Convert monopolies like Google to a utility, reduce other digital monopolies (Taplin, 2017)
  • Open discourse and public demand for transparency by digital giants like Google, Amazon, Facebook, Twitter
  • Subsidize publishing and journalism industry so its watchdog role can be maintained
  • Blockchain AI technology “cryptocurrency” funded journalism—to allow funding outside of financial central authorities (Woolf, 2018)
  • Filtering/assessing data with a closer study of networks, distributed character, cultural and social practices of meaning making and media systems, as opposed to content in isolation (Bounegru, L., Gray, J., Venturini, T., & Mauri, M., 2017, pg. 202)

 

The blockchain cryptocurrency technology (such as Bitcoin) has the ability to “distribute data across a network of participating nodes using cryptographic proof and removes the necessity for information to be controlled by a central authority…” (Woolf, 2018). This could remove journalism from the usual paywall drawbacks of advertising or through digital giants, and instead enable “an ecosystem of micropayments, in which everyone pays fractions of a penny for every article they read…” (Woolf, 2018). With the listed countermeasures, there is a need for more knowledgeable people to be involved in the ethical oversight and advocacy for algorithmic transparency. Notwithstanding, there is still the enduring question of the tyrannical control of the flow of information from monopolistic corporate and government entities.

 

Conclusion

Artificial intelligence is the pillar of our computer age, and yet is still operating under much opacity, to the vexation of those caught in the casualties of algorithmic bias. Uncorrected coding bias in concert with machine learning can cause discrimination, as demonstrated in the cases of facial recognition software errors. Other biases occur with job search results, insurance policies and credit applications. Part of the problem is because algorithms learn from historical data that can be biased, resulting in a maintenance of the status quo. This translates into unfairness and inequality, unless promising technological scholars with the social and emotional intelligence can correct what goes into coding, who codes it and why. Digital giants like Google and Facebook are of great concern for media outlets because of their black box opacity tactics in fake news filtering (Boyarsky, 2017). The rise in financial profits of Amazon, Facebook and Google resulted in great losses from 2001 onward for the newspaper publishing industry. These monopoly platforms result in a kind of propaganda filter—the first filter of size, ownership and profit—over the smaller publishing and media outlets, according to Herman and Chomsky’s propaganda model (Herman & Chomsky, 1988). The PropOrNot news filtering sweep to find pro-Russian propaganda caused a blacklisting of over 200 web sites spanning from left to right on the political scale (Boyarsky, 2017). Although some of their targeted sites may have been genuine propaganda, many were not. In this instance, one could question whether the fourth filter of “anti-communism” is being waged upon a vulnerable public. Many left wing, alternative and independent web sites were especially hit hard with drastically reduced web traffic when Google executed their new search engine filtering algorithms from April to July of 2017. This form of censorship is believed to be an attack upon those with political views and opinions which challenge the corporate and official government narratives (Damon, 2017). This kind of censorship fits into the fourth filter of “flak and enforcers” in Herman and Chomsky’s propaganda model. People are essentially being punished with reduced web traffic in ways they are largely unaware until after the fact. An incident with Twitter ghost banning is revealed in David Icke’s presentation of former UK ambassador Craig Murray’s experience being censored (Icke, 2018). Icke states that the reason Murray believes he is ghost banned is because of publically speaking out against corruption. This is also a “fourth filter” propaganda example of censorship instigated upon a former high-ranking government official.

To avert unfair censorship and algorithmic bias countermeasures need to be implemented. Demanding transparency and ethical testing of algorithms is suggested. Reducing the size of digital monopolies or converting one such as Google to a utility has been recommended (Taplin, 2017). Implementing artificial intelligence as an ally, rather than a roadblock is advocated by some who propose funding journalism with cryptocurrencies (Woolf, 2018). Open discourse must happen in such a way that journalism’s watchdog role is recovered. We must hold the power of knowledge in our own hands before we lose our awareness and ability to speak out.

 

References:

  1. Algorithm. (n.d.). Google definition. Retrieved from

https://www.google.ca/search?source=hp&ei=pkLEWvaNE6TRjwSe3ojIDw&q=definition+of+algorithm&oq=definition+of+algorithm&gs_l=psy-ab.3..0l10.1175.4879.0.5344.24.21.0.0.0.0.301.2621.0j15j2j1.18.0….0…1.1.64.psy-ab..6.18.2618.0..46j0i131k1j0i46k1.0.ZxmCqcW-6B0

2. Boyarsky, B. (2017, February 8). Will Facebook’s System to Detect Fake News Lead to

Censorship? [Blog Post]. Retrieved from https://www.truthdig.com/articles/will-facebooks-system-to-detect-fake-news-lead-to-censorship/

3. Buolamwini, J. (2016, November). How I’m fighting bias in algorithms [TEDxBeaconStreet]

Retrieved from https://www.ted.com/talks/joy_buolamwini_how_i_m_fighting_bias_in_algorithms

 

4. Damon, A. (2017, July 31). Google’s chief search engineer legitimizes new censorship algorithm

 [Blog post]. Retrieved from

https://www.wsws.org/en/articles/2017/07/31/goog-j31.html

 

5. Herman, E. & Chomsky, N., Pantheon Books (1988), Manufacturing Consent: A Propaganda

Model, Retrieved from

http://www.thirdworldtraveler.com/Herman/Manufac_Consent_Prop_Model.html

6. Icke, D., (2018, March 30). The Fake News Hoax[Video file] Retrieved from

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2T8IIfE0wEk&t=5s

7. Liliana Bounegru, Jonathan Gray, Tommaso Venturini and Michele Mauri., (2017). A Field

Guide to “Fake News” and other Information Disorders. Retrieved from

https://mymoodle.okanagan.bc.ca/pluginfile.php/1098678/mod_resource/content/1/A_Field_Guide_to_Fake_News_and_other_Information_Disorders-single_pages.pdf

8. O’ Neil, C. (2018, Jan. 26). Do algorithms perpetuate human bias. [Video file], retrieved from

https://www.npr.org/2018/01/26/580617998/cathy-oneil-do-algorithms-perpetuate-human-bias

9. Rao, P. (2016, September).

Math Is Biased Against Women and the Poor, According to a Former Math Professor. The Cut. Retrieved from https://www.thecut.com/2016/09/cathy-oneils-weapons-of-math-destruction-math-is-biased.html

10. Sandvig, C., Hamilton, K., Karahalios, K., & Langbort, C. (2016). Automation,

Algorithms, and Politics | When the Algorithm Itself is a Racist: Diagnosing Ethical Harm in the Basic Components of Software. International Journal of Communication, 10, 19. Retrieved from http://ijoc.org/index.php/ijoc/article/view/6182

11. Taplin, J. (2017, April 22). Is it time to break up Google? The New York Times.

Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/22/opinion/sunday/is-it-time-to-break-up-google.html?_r=0

12. Woolf, N. (2018, February 13). What Could Blockchain Do for Journalism [Blog post].

Retrieved from

https://medium.com/s/welcome-to-blockchain/what-could-blockchain-do-for-journalism-dfd054beb197

 

Fake Web Bots in Social Media

This is a summary of the article, “The Bot Bubble” by D.B. Clark, formerly published in 2015 by The New Republic, 246, (4), 32-41.

Because so many of us use social media, we need to understand the effects of fake bots and accounts used to create counterfeit traffic, social media followers and trolling operations.

How Click Farms Have Inflated Social Media Currency

Summary of “The Bot Bubble” by D.B. Clark

3/07/2018

Doug B. Clark, author of “How Click Farms Have Inflated Social Media Currency”, describes how “onlining” is compromising social media advertising. Black market bot farms can easily counterfeit social media accounts such as Twitter, Facebook and Youtube, providing automated “likes” for customers willing to pay the price to boost their social media image. When one considers the drastic upswing of social media usage from 8% in 2005 to 70% in 2014, (Clark, 2015, para.11) the likelihood for increased marketing for fan followership also skyrockets.  Studies found that after Facebook created the “like” button in 2009, social media driven leads had a much greater chance of translating into real sales (Clark, 2015, para. 12). Higher search engine ranking also results in better revenue, and when one has many followers on Facebook for example, this will attract even more followers, magnifying that company’s reach (Clark, 2015, para. 12).

Social media has an insidious way of manipulating the human tendency towards the desire for popularity and the insecurity of not having as much clout as one’s friends. Celebrities are often paid huge endorsement deals for big followings and according to Clark, “Khloe Kardashian-who has 13 million followers-receives $13,000 every time she tweets product endorsements” (Clark, 2015, para. 13). One can only imagine what politicians or wealthy corporations can do hiring click farms to boost their popularity. Clark also states that, “researchers estimate that the market for fake Twitter followers was maximally worth 360 million in 2013, while Facebook’s market maximized at 390 million (Clark, 2015, para. 16). Giant corporations such as Mercedes Benz, Coca-Cola and Louis Vuitton are rumoured to have hired click farms.

One such click farmer, Richard Braggs (pseudonym), started up his business in 2011 in the Philippines. Initially he created thousands of PVA’s-or phone verified accounts-with black market SIM cards, purchased for about 70 cents apiece. By 2013 he employed 17 “onliners” to create these fake bot accounts, each person averaging about 100 a day. Most of these accounts, created via Fake Name Generators, are then combined with profiles and photos from dating sites like Tinder. The real income generator for Braggs is supplying accounts and bot software that click farms use. (Clark, 2015, para 20) Most of these click farms operate out of developing countries like Mexico, Philippines, India, Iraq, Indonesia and Eastern Europe. One can do a Google search on “buy Facebook likes” for example, and come up with deals like 1000 FB likes for $29.99 or 1000 Twitter followers for $12, says Clark (Clark, 2015, para. 5).  And there is no shortage of cheap labor in countries like the Philippines who consider onlining a legal profession, much preferred over undesirable cybersex businesses, illegal fireworks or low-wage jobs.

Click farm influence on social media is sabotaging the advertising efforts for many companies. The problem with fake bot “likes” is that they do not engage with the real account holders; the bot software accounts working in unison tricks us into believing all those likes are from real people. The fake bots clog up the space for the real people who would like to engage, but are now inundated with counterfeits. Clark revealed that, “A 2014 Max Plank Institute study determined that 67% of likes on FB appear to be illegitimate for major advertising campaigns” (Clark, 2015, para. 33). This is a big problem for honest advertisers as well as social media companies, since the majority of their revenue comes from advertising. It is believed that social media is marginalizing this problem, although they claim serious efforts are being made to police bot farm influence.

The entire business model could be now called into question by advertisers (Clark, 2015, para. 35) since the majority of likes on Facebook are known to be caused by fake bots. (Clark, 2015,para. 33) Depressive global economic conditions and the ease of bot counterfeiting encourages black market onliners. The predictability of human behaviour under these conditions suggests that this dilemma will probably not be going away any time soon.

Building Upon the Real for the Greater Good

In my previous article, The Aftermath of the Alien Love Bite, Soul Types and Predators”(See: http://evelorgen.com/wp/articles/alien-love-bite-related/the-aftermath-of-the-alien-love-bite-soul-types-and-predators/) I proposed to write an article that could answer some tough questions by my clients, especially the ones who were born into “specific bloodlines” of ruling occult groups who target them for many reasons. The questions that have been repeatedly brought up by some Dark Side of Cupid, “love bite” experiencers are, “Why do I repeatedly keep being targeted by vampiric and especially “reptilian hosted” agents who seem to be run by these inter dimensional beings?” And of course the biggest question by these people is, “what can I do to keep these parasites away from me?” How can I build my life and authentic love relationships with a human being who is benevolently compatible and not like “the other predators?”

I contemplated this from a more spiritual perspective based upon a profound experience I had many years ago at the age of 22. This experience catalyzed a deep realization of remembrance, a core essence of being, whose depth of “realness” was so immense, total, absolute and freeing, that the core significance of it vindicated a deep realness within an eternal place of being. A deeper, greater reality. It was recognition of truth of beingness free of the earthly and even “astral” state of being. This deep knowing is present always, when in this state of presence. But when I returned back into my body state of consciousness, the shock of this realization was so intense it nearly gave me a heart attack. In fact, I believed at the time, if I did not return to my “body” from this realized state of beingness, my heart would explode and I would die of some kind of heart attack.

Well, I did not die physically, but the experience of spiritual remembrance left me shaken, wordless and deeply imprinted in such a way that a truth was revealed in me, for recognitions sake, beyond all religion or teachings that I had known at that time. It was not until many years later in my exploration of Gnostic, Tibetan Buddhist studies and Advaita-Vedanta mystical teachings that I came to understand this experience. But the ironic thing about this realization was that my original intention and prayers for three days and nights was to “know and understand the truth of Jesus Christ, the one in the Bible.” Well, I can assure you this was no “vision” of Jesus but more of a direct recognition of beingness that was so utterly real in its depth, that there was no question in my mind about what truth is inside our being. “Seek the Kingdom of Heaven first within you and all will be added unto you.” Each and every one of us who has an eternal spirit of awareness has this within them. But most of us do not fully remember this state of being.

 

What People Really Want—Freedom and Happiness

So much of what my counseling clients seek is of course, happiness, but more specifically, freedom from inter dimensional interference, and all that goes with this. The “archontic” Matrix control systems run by seemingly predatory beings, both human and non human— appears to be the problem on “the outside” that ruins so many lives. Ultimately I believe, building upon and recognizing the real—our internal truth of being—is the key to freedom, empowerment, love and all good things. But for most people, and even “yogis and mystics”, this must be done gradually, in such a way that we increase and expand our awareness of “reality”. This awareness becomes more and more real, until we can sustain a measure of lucidity in mindfulness.

True happiness comes from within. It actually arises out of getting in touch with our core essence of being. Contact with true reality. It is not a short term investment strategy, nor does it have to take a long time. But it does require that you desire it, are willing to be still, have faith, be patient, humble and courageous.

 
Getting Lucid with Mindfulness and Self-Observation

This must be a step by step process, where we are intentionally committed expand our own awareness, out of which comes change. Mindfulness is not really about “trying to change” but rather intending on allowing ones awareness to be aware of truth versus lies; stalking the illusions. As we go into a place of self-observation and mindfulness, we will start to perceive what distractions and “obstacles in our path” have prevented us from being still, from being happy, from feeling love. From feeling truly alive and knowing ourselves in our core essence. It is not a “conceptual self analysis” or self-absorbed narcissism either. It requires us to take notice of whatever feelings are present in the moment, without identifying with them so much that we lose our lucidity.

What is lucidity, you may ask? For me, it is awareness of being aware. Like what happens when you are in a dream, and know you are dreaming. In that moment of recognition, the reality of the dream deepens immensely, everything vivifies, and with it can come a natural state of wonder and joy of whatever arises in the moment. It unleashes the wonder of each unfolding moment as a mystery that is beyond our illusion of controlling the dream. Many people assume that lucidity in dreams is being able to control the dream or the vividness of it. But this is in error. It is the absolute knowing that you are dreaming and therefore have a greater ability to create and connect on expanded levels of being, not only as the dreamer, but as the background of the dreams and characters. It is a wonderful oneiric laboratory to explore self-healing, and discovering parts of ourselves we may not be fully aware of. We can apply lucidity in our meditation, in our daily lives. We can take advantage of this process when we have negative feelings and positive feelings. With lucid awareness our understanding of the feelings observed in that moment will be revealed in such a way, that we are able change out of an authentic awakening, with much less effort.

When we “wake up” we no longer will hold on to the things which we realize are illusions, distractions, addictions, bad relationships, avoidance or self-pity. The waking up process is not so easy however. When it does happen, it can be painful, and we may hit a threshold of obstacles, pain, and intense suffering of any number of feelings before we have that “aha!” moment. It tends to happen in stages when we can process the insights revealed over time and with maturity. In my view, the spiritual path to awakening is a healing journey where deep psychological changes take place.

 

Psychological Healing and Trauma Resolution Therapy Helps Wake Us Up

Waking up to a greater spiritual reality inevitably requires substantial psychological self reflection and healing of our deepest core wounds. This is essentially a psychotherapeutic process to root out the original causes of our suffering. It is really a rooting out process of identifying that which is false, and cutting through the psychological defenses which keep us from connecting deeper into our own core selves. Oftentimes it is easier to discover what the truth is by knowing in our heart, what we are not. And I can assure you, most beliefs in the “matrix world system” are geared to prop up false beliefs about who and what you are, in order to control you. The unenlightened love to lord over and control you, they are lovers of power, usually with big egos. Have you ever noticed how the power hungrier someone is, the more of a psychopath they turn out to be? And do you really think they have your best interests at heart?

Now here is a paradox. The truth is, things do not need to be fixed, they need to be understood. If we can truly understand without judgement and over identification and excessive emotional triggering, things will change naturally. Oh, but what does this really mean when we break things down into practical day to day living and being?

Therapy and counseling in some practices are more about alleviating symptoms or reinforcing the “matrix world view”, where pharmaceuticals are prescribed or “things to make you feel better” are advised. And on the spiritual front line of “enlightenment solutions” we can run into the fake gurus who are really spiritual predator-vampires. Gatekeepers and soul entrappers who end up identifying and feeding off of the real “gifted ones”. Then they target you to exploit or clamp down your real, supernatural abilities. I do find it almost ironic, that many who have woken up, have found out by going to hell and back. Or having been trapped by evil sorcerers, or being in an abusive relationship with a narcissist only to discover what they don’t want and who they are not. This is a huge key. You want to know why?

Because when things get bad enough you are forced to feel negative emotions. You may be forced to drop your ego and surrender enough to experience a deeper presence of being within. You may hit rock bottom like the alcoholic or drug addict who finally realizes their way of life is killing them. They finally wake up to the shocking insanity and intense pain they are feeling. It is necessary to get in touch with the negative feelings you are having, be aware of what they are. Take note of the positive ones too. What causes these feelings, really? Where do they start in your body? Can you be in your body or are you habitually dissociating? You need to be still long enough to know when your automatic, triggered avoidance patterns start kicking into gear, in ways that actually pull you out of REALITY and connection with your heart and your core self. You know that is what addictions are all about don’t you? Avoidance of uncomfortable feelings, hidden traumas and vulnerable emotional wounds.

Do you know what is funny? Addicts and alcoholics feel like life would be boring and dull without the drugs, alcohol etc. Many have not really got into contact with their core selves because they are avoiding bad feelings, perhaps repressed traumas. Trauma and addictions go together like peas and carrots. If you work on one, let’s say the drinking part, the other issue will rise to the surface. If you deal with the trauma first, and truly resolve the trauma over time, (or even rapidly with modalities such as Rapid Release Trauma Therapy, hypnotherapies etc.) your addictions may just stop by themselves. Or in the least with less effort. This is where the understanding part comes in. With understanding, things will change naturally. You don’t have to “fix feelings”, you just have to self-connect long enough to understand, let go of the illusions and the problems disappear. It is really more about letting go.

And you know what will drive psychopaths and abusers away from you? You want to get rid of them? Start a meditation practice, be still, silent and ever aware. They will think you are so BORING they will leave you alone and have to find someone else for their narcissistic supply of energy!

 

The Walls We Hit Before Waking Up

Faith is the number one necessity before any positive change can occur. This is a pre-requisite for Buddhist teachings on enlightenment and for genuine happiness as well. It is not just a Christian virtue, but is supreme in just about every religion. If you prefer, we can say that it is helpful that you see that it is desirable to wake up in order to relieve your suffering. It must be desirable to give up illusions and dependencies on what is NOT REAL so you can make contact with that deeper REALITY. That awakening to the deeper reality of your true beingness is so powerful that entire systems of control have been created to keep you addicted to the fake, so as to distract you without you even knowing you are a puppet. So do you really want freedom and awakening?

And what tends to happen before we can drop illusions, over identifications, and ego masks to go deeper inside the mystery of the heart and spirit? Those psychological defenses pop up, mind control programs, avoidance patterns, addictions, distractions and real demons could start manifesting. Oftentimes when our distraction patterns drop, we touch in with our aloneness during periods of silence. We can feel quite alone even when we are with someone, if any emotional wounds have not been dealt with. There is this thing called loneliness which can be so unbearable, despairing and empty that we avoid it at all costs, thinking loneliness can only be cured by having company, or doing the things which numb those bad feelings when you start to feel lonely or depressed. Loneliness can happen when we are with someone or alone. It can happen when we start to be still in solitude, even in meditation, as we get in touch with silence. Sometimes the loneliness is like a wall of the most despairing pain of hopelessness, non love, and shameful unworthiness. A rejection so deep, an abandonment so great that you split it off into another compartment of your being. It could be the overlay covering up rage, intense sadness or even terror. But remember this is a wall, they are feelings, which are not really you, but feelings of experience you have had or still live in you based on something much earlier in life that was never healed or made conscious.

 

Our Addictions and Avoidance Patterns Distort Our Perception of Reality

The difficult part of the self-discovery process is how many of our behaviors are running on a kind of automatic mode, something we cannot seem to consciously control from a logical perspective. When we are still running on these automatic defenses and “conditioned programs”, our perceptions of others and of reality is skewed. We tend to see people through the lens of our own addictive needs—the needs we cling to so that we don’t have to feel uncomfortable feelings, our old wounds still festering inside. If we seem to be stuck in blaming others, or trying to fix the world, we have not fully woken up. If we keep trying to control others in co-dependent relationships, we have not done our self-healing work. If we still are dependent on approval, appreciation and the constant distraction of company of others (in a compulsive way), we are still asleep. If we keep finding ourself looking for love from someone out there, we have not dealt with our stuff. If we habitually manipulate others into providing for our own “psychic energy”, attention and approval, we are actually emotional energy vampires in disguise.

Now I know this sounds harsh and like a cliche about seeking it all within. It is not ALL within but so much of it is, that if we don’t take personal responsibility and a willing humbleness to deal with our SH**, then nothing will change. Love happens through openness and awareness. It can only happen by dropping the illusions which have kept us in this merry go round of distractions, numbness and disconnection from reality.

 

What We Need is Slowing Down

There are some things that we do need, however. Safety is very important, either in or out of a relationship. Many of my anomalous trauma clients lack the safety and sustained stillness to stay with the mindful, healing and recovery process long enough to truly wake up. They may have so much drama and “interference” that any kind of committed therapy process is unlikely. And when this happens I can guarantee you it is part of the “program” to keep the person believing that it is impossible, unnecessary, too expensive, everyone else’s fault and the entire gamut of I’m right, ego rigidity and “yes but…”.excuses. Many of the excuses are part of what I call the learned helplessness, “whining victim” program that effectively self sabotages true change. And if I would tell this to someone who is in the midst of a whopping, whining victim (or predator) program, it would infuriate them. The truth is, they really believe they are powerless because they are trapped in illusions.

What we do need is willingness for more awareness, stillness, enjoying the simple pleasures of life, like decent food, water, light, exercise, a good book, perhaps an entertaining movie now and then. But what we don’t need is to be so busy that we cannot enjoy simple pleasures and instead adopt artificial stimulants, or are too busy and sleep deprived to even enjoy simple pleasures. We want to engage the true senses and slow down. When we do slow down, our senses actually come more alive, making it easier to enjoy simple pleasures. The need for addictions, drama or over stimulation falls away. It only requires a decision to be still with awareness for a short period daily or on a regular enough basis in small steps and goals. You can perceive miracles and hidden, secret things from slowing down. Your perceptions expand, and when you start noticing all kinds of things, understanding of what arises starts to awaken in you. This enables you to change, the awareness that comes with simply slowing down.

 

Mindfulness Meditation is Good

In my own experience, I had explored just about every “therapy” there is, from cognitive-behavioral talk therapy, hypnotherapy, rebirthing, interpersonal communication skills, marriage and family therapy, lucid dreaming, journaling, art therapy, dance, creative writing, martial arts, Chi Gong, authentic movement and yoga. You name it, I did it. Some significant radical shifts in expanded awareness occurred after doing a couple of 10 day shamatha meditation retreats. Shamatha meditation is a very simple form of mindful sitting meditation where one follows the breath, a single object of meditation or awareness of whatever arises in the mind. (http://www.deerparkthimphu.org/activities/shamatha.html) I personally would recommend doing this with a very good teacher in person, someone like Dr. Alan B. Wallace. (http://www.sbinstitute.com/Shamatha_Project)

Sometimes it takes getting out of your ordinary habits in a different environment, where silence and stillness with awareness is the only activity. For me, meditation is what woke me up to feeling and finally perceiving in vivid, expanded awareness, the insanity I had been living, and it was shocking and painful enough for me to change. For other individuals however, it may be something else that wakes them up in such a way as to be the catalyst for effective change. I’ve seen some “meditation junkies” become kind of addicted to the cult aspect of Buddhist community, instead of doing more deep, psychotherapeutic work. Some people actually fall into dissociation, rather than embodied awareness in stillness, that true meditation requires. This is why it is good to have an experienced teacher, who has demonstrated their own internal self-healing and mindfulness work. You will recognize them by their openness, compassion, and wisdom in how they live their lives and how well their own students learn and exemplify wisdom in their lives.

The evidence is when change starts to take place in you, in your awareness. It happens, you don’t do it. If you try to “do it” it doesn’t last. Change is natural through awareness of truth, reality and embodied self-connectedness. Then you keep your openness, flexibility, softness and compassion through awareness. It is not a rigid “trying to control”, change. Or being compelled to lecture or prove yourself right. The evidence is in the softness, ease, effortless effort, compassion, awareness, wisdom and openness. It is a tasting and feeling, an experiential, expanded perception beyond information in your head or over analyzing on a conceptual level. And with this comes strength and courageousness. Joy will start to emerge, a spontaneousness to perceive humor in life as well.

 

Doing the Healing Work

Nothing is more painful and humbling than someone telling you that, “you need therapy”, or ask you sarcastically, “are you off your meds?”. Or when a concerned family member, friend or fellow work mate suggests you get into a recovery program for an ongoing addiction you have normalized in your life, which is starting to create problems that you, apparently, are unaware of. More often than not, when we do decide to get “professional help” for something, it resulted from an uncomfortable situation in our life like a broken relationship, lost job or God forbid, a Driving Under the Influence (DUI) or police arrest. One good thing about suffering is that it can be the agent of positive change and expanded awareness. Some experiences, such as a narcissistic abuse, alien love bite relationships can be so intense and psycho-spiritually shattering that it can serve as a “spiritual initiation” of permanent consciousness change. A real wake up call.

The sad part about “not having done our healing and personal growth work”, or for short, “not dealing with your sh**” (NDWYSH), means that some part of you has disconnected from your spiritual core essence, most likely your emotional center. Part of your heart actually shuts down, and with this shutting down comes a block in your awareness, a blind spot. We do this to ourselves as a reaction to stress, trauma or deep emotional wounds. Sometimes our conditioned beliefs and ways we were raised in our family system required us to be cut off from our own authentic being, or we would not be accepted, loved. In severe cases, if we did not do or be what we were told, we were beaten up, abused or thrown out on the streets. Abandoned.

It is rather ironic that in order to psychologically survive such kinds of abuse and traumas, we abandon our own selves, to protect us from the shock of the reality that perhaps we lived in a very unsafe world, where we really were unloved or had psychopath caretakers. And for many of us, the shock of reality, the extreme vulnerability and powerlessness of childhood, and our feelings about the craziness we have had to endure, was too much for a young child.(It can be too much for an adult!) That inner child—whose real needs, identity, whose heart and soul had to be abandoned or be put in cold storage somewhere, until some day, it would be safe enough to be who we are and feel what we feel.

 
Co-Dependency is a Spiritual Issue

In Melanie Tonia Evans article, “On Co-Dependency and Narcisicism, (See: http://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/2014-co-dependency-check-up/) she addresses the culprit of the spiritual disease of Co-Dependency and Narcissism:

“Societal beliefs, unconsciousness, and the horrific programming of ‘Needing to get worthiness, value, approval, and love outside of ourselves’ is all responsible for the dis-ease (yes it is a human disease) of co-dependency.

The reason being is: we are all a product of a world that looks “outwards” for comfort and fulfillment. We were NOT taught to come inside and self-partner in times of stress.
Rather we were told to “Shut up and get on with it”, or that our feelings and emotions were “inconvenient” and “irrelevant” and therefore had to be ignored, repressed, shoved aside or switched off.
As a result we all became more and more disconnected from our emotional centres and we tried to acquire stuff or people’s love and approval to stop the pain, and when that failed we took up addictions (self-avoidance mechanisms) to try to numb ourselves out from the pain.

Co-dependency is a spiritual disease. It is NOT a psychological issue, the psychological component is the symptom. It is an emotional issue, a soul issue.  The remedy does not lie in logical thinking. It requires a deep connection back to yourself and your true connection with Source / Life / God.

Until we know we are at One with Source (and at the Quantum Level that is the absolute scientific truth) we cannot ever be at One with ourselves, others or this planet.
This is when we suffer the results of “disconnection” and are not generating the Source truth of “wellbeing”. Rather we are granted by Source/Life/God the results of our free will choice of living in the illusions of “separation”.

And that separation hurts so much it makes us want to be addicted to whatever alleviates these awful feelings of disconnection from our true REAL SELVES/SPIRIT/SOURCE.

By reacting in unconscious triggering, and whatever addictions we choose to effectively numb our pain, this decision constitutes an agreement to disconnect from our heart and soul, leaving us open for other substitutes to run our “vehicle”. This disconnect also takes away from our life force energy and our awareness in consciousness, because energy and awareness are linked. The more your energy is lost, the less aware you become.

We may have grown up this way, living in dysfunctional families, where all these kinds of crazy behaviors were normalized, including verbal abuse, emotional neglect, boundary invasions, poor communication skills and addictions. And when we grew older, and entered into relationships, jobs and started raising our own families, we started having huge problems. Sometimes it is the problems that wake us up to the discovery of how blind, numb, abusive or victimized we really were. And when we don’t heal these original wounds, we set ourselves up to be hurt even more, sometimes as victims or on the other end of it as perpetrators of abuse.

The difficult thing about effective, lasting change is that it must be dealt with on deeper levels of our being, not just logical analysis or simple awareness of your patterns. It must happen in such a way that you connect to the younger feeling parts of yourself that initially experienced the trauma, the vulnerable part who held false beliefs about themselves or the world, that needs to be let go of. The self abandonment that occurs with early traumas are often linked in with Boundary issues. According to Melanie Tonia Evans,

“True empowered boundaries mean: ‘I love myself and I know my truth. I know who I am, and I will not compromise myself anymore. You have a choice to be in my reality of meeting this higher vibration. If you don’t – that’s okay – I’m not in anymore regardless of the consequences. Because in no way is the correct and healthy development of my life dependent on you making any particular choice, or even understanding what I need. You are NOT my source of self – I AM!’

Now of course we don’t reach this level of conduct until we have done the work on ourselves to get there, and naturally the work is about finding and up-levelling the young unhealed parts of our Inner Being that are still hooked on “You HAVE to be the source of me because I can’t be that to myself”.

It is true, as children we couldn’t be a source to ourselves, we were entirely co-dependent. We were powerless and vulnerable, and if we haven’t healed and up-levelled these young parts – which means self-developing and growing them lovingly and supportively up – they still affect us, regardless of knowing better logically. I promise you the painful aspects of our life are not being created logically, and they can’t be solved logically.

It’s been stated in therapy circles, “There is no healing without feeling”. And I believe this is true. Sometimes all we need is the safety, empathy and permission to feel whatever is happening inside us with gentle nudging towards real release and deep insight. It is amazing what people do when they hit their “wall” of the pain.(Or PTSD overload) Oftentimes they may spin into story telling, over and over, in a cyclic, anger—addicted way, without true resolution of the underlying feeling. Feelings are in layers, and what most people do not understand is that emotions like rage and anger are actually secondary. They cover up deeper feelings that are more vulnerable. The goal is to be able to reach that wall with awareness of what we habitually have been doing to jerk away from the “feeling”, the real memories etc., so we can address that protective part and the beliefs it may hold— which “takes control” to avoid the issue. For some people, they need more aggressive confrontation and redirection to be present with THAT FEELING and memory. Others need more gentle reassurance, nudging and guidance to take that feeling to its origin in the present now. Sometime it must be taken slowly, so that the feelings and embodied awareness of processing this energy can be done with more self control, safely without triggered PTSD syndrome.

Being able to feel, be vulnerable, feel safe, and let go of what is pent up inside creating so many problems, is not always an easy, logical process. It can take time, or it can be relatively fast, once the defenses are set aside to release and get to the truth. Working directly with the subconscious mind, identifying those beliefs and fears is the eventual goal for more rapid resolution. We must get in touch with those abandoned parts, love them, forgive them, self parent them, and allow these parts to grow up. This is how you stop seeking and expecting others to always fill those voids, to be happy. Then we are less likely to attract predators. The predators will be attracted to you if you still are not taking personal responsibility for your healing and still have self abandonment and “blind spots”. If we keep seeking others to “take away our pain”, keep us from feeling lonely, depressed or looking for that magic healer to “clear all my implants, attached entities”, etc. we will fall into the same traps. It is not that a therapist or healer cannot help you, but it should be, rather, that they help guide you to help yourself and bring into your awareness the self-discovery to heal yourself. You have to be ready to feel, and see what you are really believing about yourself, life and others. The denial must be dropped for clear perception. And clarity comes as you drop those addictions, illusions, excessive fears and desires.

If you haven’t gotten it yet that healing is all about deeper self-connection, self responsibility, expanded awareness, and being willing to be vulnerable in your heart, you will fall back into the co-dependent “conditioning program”. Or keep on being addicted to numbing, blaming others, acting out, etc. Or you may fall into the perpetrator rather than victim role, or vacillate between the two.

How can we become more aware of what we are really doing, not doing, believing, or feeling in ways that indicate there is still some healing to do? Are you worried or compelled to try to “protect people from their feelings”? Do you do this unconsciously? What fears are driving you—what beliefs? Practice awareness, mindfulness. Here is a good “Co-Dependency Checklist” that Melanie Tonia Evans created for those in recovery programs:

 
▪ Do you spend a lot of time worrying about what other people think about you?
▪ Do you try to impress other people and make them happy so that you can be happy?
▪ Do you often analyse other people’s lives?
▪ Do you get distressed by bad things that happen which are out of your control?
▪ Do you say and do what you think other people want you to say and do?
▪ Do you try to control other people’s behaviour so that you can feel okay?
▪ When an interaction with someone goes ‘wrong’ do you spend time analysing their actions, what they said and what they might be feeling and thinking?
▪ Do you find it difficult to speak up and confront an issue when you feel uncomfortable?
▪ Do you blame other people for the way you feel?
▪ Do other people’s moods bring your own mood down?
▪ Do you immediately think of someone else who needs this information more than you?
▪ Do you seek and listen to other people’s opinions rather than seeking and listening to your own?
▪ Do you obsess over saying the wrong thing or hurting someone else’s feelings?
▪ Do you hang on to people and situations even when it hurts, hoping they will change into something better?
▪ Do you often feel selfish, guilty or ‘what a waste of time’ when you do something nice for yourself?
▪ Do you often say ‘Yes’ when you really want to say ‘No’?
▪ Do you struggle to listen to your own feelings and go along with other people’s feelings?
▪ Do you give a lot of yourself to other people, even if they don’t ask, and then get upset when they don’t do the same in return?
▪ Do you try to fix or change other people to be who you want them to be?
▪ Do you try and help or fix others who don’t take responsibility for themselves?
▪ Do you tend to put everyone else’s needs before your own?
▪ Do you avoid taking charge of your own life, and / or creating your own happiness in the hope that someone will provide it for you?

For most of us, we didn’t learn how to communicate with reflective empathy, we just did what was modeled to us in our families. And if we never even bothered to do any personal growth work, mindfulness, healing and honest self-reflection, we are likely to be projecting our “stuff” on others unconsciously. We must really know our own histories, childhoods, relating patterns and what our own families have modeled to us. Are we aware of ethics and spiritual laws that may open us up to dark forces and predators? What agreements of entrapment are we actually holding onto without realizing its ramifications? I’m often astounded at how unaware many “normal seeming” people are, who have found themselves victim to psychopaths, supernatural predators and narcissists.

What prevents some people from true mutuality in friendships of respect? Could it be their refusal to be vulnerable to their own hearts and feelings? Are they rigidly holding onto denial and illusions, making you wrong so they don’t have to grow up? Are they trying to control you with their version of what they think “reality” is, while marginalizing your worth and freedom? Do they play fair in relationships so that compassionate communication can even happen? Do they have value systems that marginalize compassionate communication and reflective empathy? Is their own blind spots and psychological defenses causing cold, insensitive behaviors that hurt you? We need to also ask ourselves if we do these kinds of things to others as well.

Perhaps we must ask how much we value our own souls, and choosing what we want to be connected with. Do we really want to experience the truth of REALITY?

 
That Mystery Called Love

I found myself having ahas! when listening to the mystic, Thomas De Mello. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pNb_tYuHfY&index=69&list=PL9285D44ED7F7B18B)

The ever present desire and need for LOVE is a consistent topic of discussion everywhere. So many people want to experience true love, feel more loved, love more. Contrary to what we tend to assume, adoration does not lead to love, reality, life or truth. Love is generated through awareness of what is REAL.

Thomas De Mello says, “If you wish to Love, You must learn to see again. You must give up your drug.” These ‘drugs’ is a term for all our psychological defenses, distractions, co-dependent addictions or whatever you do to avoid your uncomfortable feelings. Love actually comes through awareness. It comes from dropping the illusions and obstructions to pure perception. Love is the essence of REALITY and your own eternal spiritual beingness.

(See: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWGnV4eFCbM&list=PL9285D44ED7F7B18B&index=68)

Wisdom has always been more about what illusions we are willing to let go of. Dropping your masks and pretenses. It is the same for love. As Thomas De Mello says simply,

The unobstructed heart and mind is love and wisdom. Understand the obstruction and obstacles and they will drop. Turning on the light of awareness. Happiness is not something you acquire or produce or have. Love is something that has you! “

In practice and with time, you surrender to it when you are aware of your illusions, addictions, desires and fears. It is a gradual process of tearing away those conditioned “assumptions” and attachments we have clung to, oftentimes without even knowing how we did it. These “mind control programs” and clinging desires are like sticky tentacles latching onto us, creating a “tar baby” effect. (See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tar-Baby)

In aloneness, where we can be in enough solitude to be aware of and let go of these clinging dependencies, it will be like a cold turkey death. If you can be alone not having the company of people, and be emotionally dependent on them anymore to feel special, adored, appreciated, you will become free. You can be in the midst of people, and enjoy their company but they will no longer have any power over you, to make you happy or miserable. Your dependence on them dies and your capacity to love is born. Why? Because you no longer see others as the means to satisfy your addictions and dependencies.

There can be a terror in this kind of aloneness, it is like dying. There could be withdrawal symptoms, like a dark pit of emptiness. When you have let go of your own need to control someone else, need them to “love you” or be special to anyone you are getting it. If you can get to this point, you will at last know. You will be able to perceive with a vision that is clear and unclouded by fears or desires. Then you can truly love. But you must go through the pains of loss, letting go of addictions, illusions and be utterly alone before this can happen.

Dependence dies and your capacity to love is born. Why—because you no longer see others as the means to satisfy your addictions or narcissistic supply!

No, I don’t think it means being a saint or an advanced yogi who retreats to meditate in caves for years on end. It is a quality of intention with awareness, humbleness, and the dedication to see things through because you are sick and tired of hurting all the time. When you are sick of the pain, the endless recycling of misery, the ridiculous control systems by idiotic predator psychopaths, you will come to a place where enough is enough. Taking personal responsibility means creating the option for freedom, and true happiness. Being in the world but not of it.

But first, we actually have to come to respect our own spiritual heart. Any deep truths and feelings we buried. We must realize the greatest violence to our own being is self-abandonment. It is this self-abandonment that causes the feelings of loneliness, hurt, sorrow and disconnectedness from REALITY.

To paraphrase what Thomas De Mello said,

“You must cultivate ceaseless awareness, patience and compassion as you would have for a drug addict. Develop taste for good things in life, pure, simple, things. Work, laughter, intimacy with people to whom you do not cling or who you depend emotionally, but whose company you enjoy. Activities you can do with your whole being, while engaged in them. Success or recognition don’t mean a thing to you. It will help if you return to nature. Mountains—silently commune with trees, animals, flowers, birds, clouds, sky and stars etc. Spiritual exercise to gaze at things, to be aware of things around you. The world will drop, concepts will drop and you will see and you will make contact with reality. That is the cure for lonliness. We usually seek to cure our loneliness through our emotional dependence on people, distractions, noise. Get back to nature. Then you will know your heart has brought you to the vast desert of solitude. No one there to depend on. At first it is unbearable because you are unaccustomed to aloneness. Stick it out, the desert will blossom into love, your heart will burst into song. It will be springtime forever. Drug is gone, you are free. Then you will understand what freedom is, love is, happiness, what REALITY is. Truth is, what GOD is.”

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWGnV4eFCbM&list=PL9285D44ED7F7B18B&index=68)
Our next panel discussion we want to address the concepts of the Matrix engineers using polarity “choices” for neutralization, soul corruption and harvesting strategies. What we need to be doing and letting go of in order to take responsibility for dealing with our SH**. What happens if we choose to ignore the wisdom of our own Source connected Spirit.

Useful blog and links for PTSD Recovery: http://www.new-synapse.com/aps/wordpress/?p=1022

Updated Declaration of Non-Consent for Interference from Laura Leon’s web site: http://www.sovereignkees.com/non-consent-declaration.html

Online Anomalous Trauma Support Group

Hello,

This is a quick reminder that we have several spaces still open for our next block of Anomalous Trauma Support Group sessions, that start on Friday, Oct. 30, 2015, at 4pm Eastern time zone.

This will be a block of 6 sessions, every week on Fridays and go for 2-3 hours. It is on Zoom videoconferencing format, and all you need is audio and preferably a video camera. But this can be attended via telephone or iphone also. Zoom is free to download at www.zoom.us

This group will be facilitated by myself, Eve Lorgen and my colleague Laura Leon.

The topics of discussion will be geared towards the needs of the group, whatever specific types of experiences they feel the need to explore and talk about. This can include the spectrum of anomalous trauma as previously described on my main page. I want to be clear however, that this group is for those who are functional, not institutionalized, or having any major Axis 1 or 2 personality disorders such as Borderline, Narcissistic, Histrionic, major depression or major alcohol or substance abuse addictions. This is for those who sincerely want to work on personal growth, expand awareness and become more sovereign considering having had histories of anomalous trauma.

The emphasis of this kind of group is on reflective and empathic listening, learning how to develop emotional intelligence and expand personal awareness, exploration of what ones own history is, emotional triggers, patterns of behavior, blind spots, learning about boundaries and what it means to take personal responsibility for ones own healing process and sovereignty.

There is a nominal fee for the group at $25.00/session, and suggested to be paid in full for the 6 sessions or in segments of 2-3 payments. Once the session is paid for, a Zoom link will be sent to the participating individuals. It is suggested to let the facilitators know at least two days prior to the group if they will attend and pay before attending. We want to keep this group small at 10 participants, so reserve your spot soon.

In the past several articles and topics have been suggested for reading or for topics of interest, such as:

Compassionate Communication, Reflective Listening and Inner Empathy Process

Interdimensional Interference and Emotional Triggering

Love Bite or Twin Flame, Relationship orchestration or interference issues

Narcissistic Abuse and Recovery

Mind Control, Programming and Abduction/Milab issues

If you have any questions, feel free to email Eve at : elorgen@gmail.com or Laura Leon at laudaleon@gmail.com

Sobriety, Recovery and New Social Skills

Contributed by editor and writer Melissa Hall.
 

Recovering From Recovery – Learning To Socialize With Sobriety

In a typical Hollywood setup, a character admitting to an addiction problem and entering a recovery program is viewed as the end of the story – the self-realization and transformation around which all stories turn, and the precipitant of the ‘happy ending’. In real life, it doesn’t work out quite like that. While admitting to addiction and making a commitment to change is certainly a pivotal moment in your transformation into the person you feel you should be, it is not an end in itself. The process of recovery is complex and ongoing – and it involves a lot of coming to terms with who you are and how you must be from now on. One of the major hurdles which any recovering addict must overcome is that of shame. While any addict must take a certain amount of responsibility for their actions, and feel a measure of remorse for them, feelings of intense shame relating to one’s addiction have been proven to exacerbate rather than diminish the chances of relapse occurring [1]. To recover successfully, an addict needs to own and assimilate their past. One of the areas of life in which problems arise with this process of assimilation is during social time with friends and family.

Coming To Terms

Admitting to an addiction is difficult. Often, one’s addiction doesn’t just encompass the substance itself, but is intrinsically wrapped up in the entire life of the sufferer. Given the place of alcohol in our society [2], this is most true for alcoholics. Admitting to an alcohol addiction does not just mean giving up alcohol – it may mean giving up (or feeling like you must give up) your entire social circle and way of life. It is frequently the case that other people may come to the realization that an addict has a problem before they do – and even when they are told of the concerns of others they may well brush them off. Admitting to oneself that one has an addiction is thus a major part of the recovery process, and this step may well come long after one’s nearest and dearest are well aware of the problem. However, introducing one’s recovering state to one’s wider social circle is a different story. One may well feel that one has come to personal terms with one’s state as a recovering addict – but when it comes to telling other people, a whole lot of unresolved issues can emerge.

Being In Control

Often, an addict will feel intense shame and discomfort when disclosing their addicted status. Such feelings, as already discussed, can prompt relapse, so it is important to choose the context of any disclosure very carefully. While honesty is undoubtedly always the best policy, you must also feel in control of your status as a recovering addict, and confident and comfortable about disclosing such a personal piece of information. Given that many addicts already have problems with feelings of powerlessness and lack of control [3], and may well experience increased emotional turbulence in the early stages of recovery [4] it is absolutely imperative that an addict is not made to feel powerless, out of control, and shamed because of their recovering status with others. For many, admitting to being in recovery is tantamount to admitting to being a societal failure – it’s admitting to being an out-of-control addict, which society frowns upon. In fact, admitting to being in recovery is admitting to being strong and controlled enough to face up to yourself and defeat your demons. That’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of.

Owning Your Addiction

Admittedly, societal attitudes towards addiction really do not help people to make a calm, collected, and unabashed declaration of their status and intent to recover. Given that we demonize addicts [5] to a disproportionate degree, it can be hard for people to accept that their friend (who may well not in their eyes fit the stereotypical ‘addict’ image we’re led to expect) is really having problems. It’s not at all uncommon for alcoholics to be told that they’re over exaggerating their case, that they don’t have to give up completely, that they’re really not as bad as they think they are, that they should not refer to themselves as alcoholics and so forth [6]. None of this, for obvious reasons, is particularly helpful. On the other hand, people may start to view their recovering addict friend with suspicion and trepidation – as though they’ve become a different person, when in fact they’re the same old friend that they’ve known and loved. The only difference is that they’re trying to make an active improvement to their life. If others reject one’s intent to recover and try to pressure one into using again, or make them feel like a shameful demon, and if one cannot convince them of the reality of the situation then – hard though it may be – it is probably time to move on from that group of friends and find people who will be supportive of one’s recovery without shaming one for their past. Recovery is something to be proud of, and it should not involve having to completely blot out one’s past and personality. In order to truly recover, an addict needs to be in control of their recovery, which means being in control and comfortable with disclosing one’s recovering status. Social disclosure can be one of the hardest parts of recovery, and should not, therefore, be done in the wrong context. However, if it’s done correctly, with confidence and ownership of one’s past and future, to people with whom one feels safe and supported by, then it can be a greatly empowering step forward.

[1] Maia Szalavitz, “Being Ashamed of Drinking Prompts Relapse, Not Recovery”, Time, Feb 2013

[2] Social Issues Research Center, “Social and Cultural Aspects Of Drinking”

[3] Rita Milios, “Control Freak: How to Stop Trying to Change Your World and Change Yourself Instead”, Recovery.org, Jun 2015

[4] H.C. Fox, K.A. Hong, R Sinha, “Difficulties in emotion regulation and impulse control in recently abstinent alcoholics compared with social drinkers”, Yale University, 2008

[5] Matthew B Stanbrook, “Addiction is a disease: We must change our attitudes towards addicts”, CMAJ, Feb 2012

[6] Rachael Lander, “How Not To Be A Dick To Your Recovering Alcoholic Friend”, XOJane, Apr 2013

Facing Fear Head-On: Laurie Boggs Interview with Solaris Blue Raven

Laurie Boggs appeared as a guest on Solaris Blue Raven “Ravenstar’s “Witching Hour” Show on May 2, 2015.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gt3ciNXDDXs&feature=youtu.be

Laurie Boggs is an extraordinary survivor of generational abuse, raised in an alcoholic family, and survived a harrowing “drunk driving” (the other driver) accident resulting in the death of her 8 year old son. She had a near death experience two separate times due to the resulting physical injuries which included a coma and brain injury.

Prior to her accident and “awakening” she was more left-brained, but her accident and resulting brain injury thrust her into the more intuitive side of her nature, enabling communication with her deceased loved ones, including her 8 year old son who died in the crash.

Laurie realized during her healing journey that the generational abuse and soul patterning re-created certain kinds of life events, which revolved around alcohol abuse, trauma, accidents and sexual abuse. During her healing process she released the ancestral burdens and patterns, canceling contracts and agreements, which she believes to be part of the false “spiritual hierarchy” agenda. Forgiveness, empathy and love is available when we connect to the place of the heart where unconditional love of Source Beingness exists and where self understanding rests. But in order to reach this place, one has to heal the grief, forgive, and be willing to go to the places within our being—the emotions which can keep us stuck in patterns. When we heal ourselves we can also heal our own families and break the curse of some forms of generational abuse and unhealthy coping patterns.

Laurie also said there is something to be said about “alcohol spirits” and what happens when we allow ourselves to be run by something else, ie., entities, when we get “drunk”. We willingly open ourselves up to these kinds of inter-dimensional forces through addictions and unhealed wounds. And we do have choices. Healing the trauma resolves the stuck patterns and stops the vulnerability to these types of external manipulations. Laurie understood in her own past experience of drinking and driving that something else can enter to run you in these situations where you can have a choice in the matter. When you hear her speak you know that she comes from a place of true empathy and understanding with a wise, perceptive heart.

Laurie is an inspiring woman, who has authentically gone deeper into compassion and forgiveness that allowed her heart to expand, exemplifying a heart intelligence that is very perceptive on many levels. She wrote two books,

Facing Fear Head On” and “18 Stepping Stones to Transformation of Grief“, geared towards those who have lost a loved one or child.

http://www.amazon.com/Hitting-Fear-Head-On-Light-ebook/dp/B00JAYMCRQ/ref=pd_sim_kstore_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=0MWMGGE8FWNA72HM5WFW

http://www.amazon.com/Stepping-Stones-Transforming-Grief-Transform-ebook/dp/B00JAYW1QI/ref=pd_sim_kstore_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=19Q1ESRR5XKRP9H5RJNX

 

 

 

How the Veil is Lifted and the Miracle of Healing

These are two clips of a longer youtube Audio Talk by Jonathan Adampant’s from the original The Healing Begins Now Youtube Video. Because the original is 4 hours long, many do not have the time to listen to the entire talk. I have listened to his talks many times over and have selected two clips that I believe really express the keys to LIFTING THE VEIL of supernatural awareness and power.

The Healing Begins Now Clip

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiXumdbRAaw   24 of 27 

  • The insanity of “polarity”, having to be taught good and bad, balancing good and “evil” when you really don’t need to do this (in certain ways) because innately we are born with all goodness inside. It’s the shutting off of this connection to Creative Spirit that leads us to become “other” than love and awareness. The cancer consciousness, this computer like entity (the Gnostic understanding of Demiurge?) which must assess the effects of “creation” from a structural and polarity based point of view—is the  imposed system which we don’t need. It comes from a place of lack and imposes its “view of reality” upon us from its own separation consciousness. This yields all manner of incomplete and false belief systems about “reality” and how things must be.
  • How parts of yourself become split off outside of your body whenever any negative event and emotion occurs,(ie., trauma dissociation) and how these parts actually hold awareness and knowledge of things.They can be tortured to watch the you doing things, addictions etc. that are hurting you.
  • “Recovering the innocence you had as a child, through healing, connecting, recovering these parts, THEN THE VEIL BECOMES LIFTED.
  • The veil becomes lifted by having the desire, intention and humility to go to places within the self (ie., emotional realm) to discover greater awareness and release from pain. It is this intention and desire through humility and love that is the key. This is the essence of what true COUNSELING and HEALING is all about. And yet people in their pain, programmed and unaware arrogance, think they know it all and bypass the most precious gift of all, Love and Awareness. Joy.
  • Healing can take place now, whether something happened one moment ago or years ago. Being in the moment of that “feeling/experience” while connected to loves intention is how it can be cleared all now, resulting in miraculous shifts of reality in your life.
  • To do Counseling is not about you having “problems” and that something is bad or wrong with you. (Who or whatever led you to believe that there is something shameful about counseling? Ask yourself this and what belief system sets up this kind of destruction.) It is the willingness to explore the hidden realms of your own treasure chest of being, so that you can be more of who you are. Love, wisdom, awareness, creativity and joy.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqOKMB7tHEc 25 of 27

  • The key to healing and lifting the veil. How shame, guilt cause you to kick out parts of your soul out of your body. Gaps of yourself stuck on the outside of your body. Fractals of your holographic being existing in other dimensions. Those parts of you see whats going on in this world in subtle realms of reality. (Oftnetimes they are screaming to get your attention to WAKE UP and you wonder why all these strange things are happening to you? LOL)
  • Forgiveness, understanding of these hurt parts of self. They erase the barrier to awareness. Heal yourself of the past, everything you hate yourself for…The imprint or program keeps these parts of you outside of you. Stuck in unawareness and powerlessness. Release the program, the imprint. This part of you, when released is WHAT WAKES YOU UP. More energy and new awareness that is connected to the Creator Spirit is now available to you, to LOVE and heal even more. And to help heal and awaken others.
  • I and thou realization through love so powerful that profound healing and miracles happen. Realize the parts of you are others, as well as those parts you shunned through shame, guilt, pain, self-hatred.
  • The deal about Jesus Christ. Religious deceptions and corruptions. True healing and connection to Divine Creator Spirit is not about “giving your heart and soul to Jesus”. It’s not about him being your Lord and Savior. Not about worship of some deity. It’s about love of yourself, awareness in humility of connection to all those hurt parts of yourself. Knowing you in others, not through projection or assumption of who they are, but really knowing you in them through the love that you are in the ALL. The All in All is you and them. Understanding and realizing the scaler mode of how we are in multidimensionality.
  • Discerning the illusion of false beliefs, religious deities and the cancer consciousness. You know by connecting to your own being, your pain, your shame, your guilt and your own compassion, love, joy and true insight of wisdom.
  • Patience. How to help heal, awaken, give— when you are essentially an invisible ghost to the unawakened around you. What to do?

 

Jonathan Adampants Collection

In a previous post on “The Healing Begins Now” I summarized the content and theme of Jonathan Adampants connection to Divine Creator Spirit and how this connection helped heal a woman with cancer. http://evelorgen.com/wp/news/connection-to-intuition-truth-and-source-love-a-recording-by-jonathan-adampants/

I’ve listened to all of Jonathan Adampants video talks and am so impressed with the  material and detail of his knowledge of “awakening” when the veil is lifted. This lifting of the veil is when the Creator Spirit really opens up the perceptions of those who intend with love and purity of spirit.

All video talks are informative to the truth seeking person, especially when it comes to spiritual deception, mind control, positive and negative entities, connecting to the Divine Creator Spirit and how to “read between the lines” when Creator Spirit of Truth is communicating. This happens especially through nature with animals or even people and through synchronicities. Jonathan also reveals that demonic and the cancer consciousness can also communicate through people and this often happens through neurolinguistic double meaning. He admits also that the dark forces often interfere with any planned group meeting of truth seekers. The power of Creator Spirit in healing best occurs through spontaneity.

I particularly liked the video entitled, “Propaganda, Parables and Perception”.

See: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnYzJGC9xKU&index=5&list=PL69580528859090D1

Knowledgehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYT6rRliNjs&list=PL69580528859090D1&index=2

The Third Phase:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lzfrIx7QdfY

Church Defined: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0TbCwC3OuY&index=4&list=PL69580528859090D1

Important Teaching for Spiritual Healers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PStZbwhsFVQ&list=PL69580528859090D1&index=7

This is a Blog Forum from 2008 where Jonathan made several comments of a technical nature about dimensions and perception of other dimensions:

http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread328667/pg24

 

Appearance at Paracon Conference in Benecia, CA Sept 26-27, 2014

Eve Lorgen will be presenting at the Bay Area Paracon 2014. Paracon Benecia Ad for KarenSMALLBAParacon_Banner_for_websites

*Note Date Change from original promo: The Bay Area Paracon will be held on September 26- 27th , 2014 in Benicia, CA. It is the largest Paracon in Northern California with two full days of International Celebrity Guests, Ghost Tours, Vendors and Enthusiasts.

For the Schedule see:  http://bayareaparacon.com/2014-schedule/

http://bayareaparacon.com/

I will be speaking about Paranormal Interference in Love Connections, an overview of both my books and especially The Dark Side of Cupid. My presentation time is on Saturday afternoon.

http://bayareaparacon.com/eve-lorgen/

Here is a Press Release recently done on the Conference:

Ghost Hunters Descend Upon Benicia for Bay Area Paracon 

Public invited to join paranormal investigation Saturday September 27

Benicia, CA (September 22, 2014) Bay Area Paracon, Benicia’s first conference on paranormal activity is attracting celebrity ghost hunters, paranormal TV investigators, intuitives, authors and their fans to Benicia on September 27, a city known for unusual activity. The program is open to the public and tickets are available now. 

A highlight of the conference is an experiential ghost investigation of Benicia’s historic Capitol led by paranormal speaker detectives. A portion of funds from ticket sales will benefit the non-profit Benicia State Parks Association (BSPA). Space is limited and advance registration required.

Bay Area Paracon features nationally recognized paranormal speakers including celebrity TV investigator, Ben Hansen of the hit SyFy television show, Fact or Faked: Paranormal Files; Brian Cano, paranormal investigator of the American reality television series Haunted Collector; Jeff Dwyer, Bay Area author of several successful books on ghost hunting and paranormal phenomena; Eve Lorgen, paranormal researcher, hypnotherapist and author, The Love Bite, Alien Interference in Human Relationships, plus Cinthia Varkevisser, intuitive graphologist. The event will be moderated by Karen Rontowski, comedian, ghost huntress and Reiki master.

“I have had an interest in clairvoyance ever since I was very young and Benicia is the perfect location for northern California’s paranormal conference,” said Carol Reed, longtime Benicia resident, intuitive and Bay Area Paracon producer. Along with a rich and vibrant past, Benicia has a unique history and paranormal evidence making it an exceptional city to explore including ghost sightings at the Capitol. Over the decades, many unexplained occurrences, strange incidences and other unusual phenomena have been reported. I look forward to exploring this first hand with our paranormal investigators,” she continued.

Dan Smith, Volunteer Coordinator, Benicia State Parks Association (BSPA) stated, “We have a very interesting old photograph from the 19th century and reports of an apparition dressed in period clothing that visits the Capitol regularly. This sighting contributes to the on-going debate about whether the Capitol is haunted. We are excited to have experts on paranormal activity visit our town and see what they think.”

On Friday, September 26, participants are invited to join in a Para-Mingle at the Benicia Yacht Club where fans, novices and the merely curious can mingle with their favorite paranormal TV hosts, authors and investigators.

For more information and to buy tickets to the Para-Mingle, Bay Area Paracon or Ghost Investigation fund-raiser, visit Bay Area Paracon or call Carol Reed 925-395-1200.

 

Connection to Intuition, Truth and Source Love–a Recording by Jonathan Adampants

Jonathan Adampants– “The Healing Begins Now”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQejWZS2P1E&app=desktop

In this 4 hour recording, Jonathan Adampants, a spirit connected truth speaker, discusses how his connection to Source Creator communicates pure truth, through intuition. Intuition of Source “truth” is a natural process of the beingness of Love which will communicate its intention through models and metaphors in nature.

The emphasis of this talk is how “cancer” is not only a physical representation of “separation consciousness” of fear, anger and “illusion”, (i.e.., separation from Self/Source/God), but it is also an archontic kind of loveless consciousness, which seeks to devour all else unto itself as the only beingness, because it “doesn’t know “ it is separated from Source. It’s identity is all it knows and seeks to draw unto itself like a “cancer” of immortality that ultimately will destroy its host like a parasite. Jonathan even describes how “cancer consciousness” will employ seduction, deception and control to achieve its own ends of “takeover”, much like “evil” does.(Sound familiar?) It offers its magical feats of “power” and immortality to take over the cells and tissues of the body, but in the long term it will destroy its host and ultimately disconnect the host from the Source of life itself.

When we have trauma in life, the shock of this trauma can cause a dissociation and separation of parts of the soul from its own core connection to “Source/Love/God”. This separation results in fear, and all manner of negative emotions and an illusion of separation, where “another consciousness” takes over, which is really “anti-life”. Love is really the answer, and yet it is not so easy when separated consciousness is shocked into a self protected “program of falsehood” which keeps it from realizing and remembering its own Source of being. This is cancer consciousness. Or, we can also say it is a metaphor for Archontic consciousness which is sweeping the planet with all manner of artificial intelligence of control systems that are literally trying to take over all organic life Source consciousness.

Luckily, organic Source Love is more powerful, and once we connect with this source of beingness of that which we already are, we will be able to overcome this dark wave sweeping the planet. It is a paradox in many ways, because once one really “gets it” by this direct connect to Source, healing is instantaneous and holographic. Not only does healing take place, but the awareness of the archontic infection is blatantly apparent, which can be quite a disturbing “shock” to those who awaken to this reality. Remember in the Gnostic tractates of the Nag Hammadi Library, where once someone becomes illumined with gnosis: “At first they will become disturbed”. Remember this, and know that you are not alone.

A  concerned man sent me, “The Healing Begins Now” youtube link audio recording, because after listening to Jonathan Adampants’ discussion of truth realizations of healing and the nature of realty, he became suddenly aware of a drastic shift in awareness. During this same time period the man also did a personalized pineal glad detox program. He became aware of what seemed to be the “predator-flying-fish” archontic parasites that have been described in Carlos Castenada’s work, as well as some of the images that Robert Stanley had on his web site of the flying fish, predator life forms. In his experiences, these forms could shift, and appear bug-like as well.

At the time he emailed me I was and usually am so busy I had no time to listen to the 4 hour recording, let alone a couple of hours. But for some reason I was compelled to speak to the man who sent me the recording. We talked on the phone about his newfound awareness of these predatory interfering parasites and what was happening and possibly why.

Instead of starting from the beginning of the talk, I listened to the last 45 minutes of Jonathan Adampants’ recording. I was so intrigued by this direct hit of “truth” that I went back and started from the beginning of the audio recording. The final part is deeply moving and describes a profound, spontaneous healing experience with a woman who had cancer, who was a talented singer, yet shy of singing in public. When the “hit” of Source Love pervaded their connected experience, a spontaneous healing occurred and the woman sang to him, beautifully and without reservation. Not only was her cancer healed, but her shyness to just living her joy of singing evaporated, without any reservation or shyness at all. I believe it all happened in a moment of I and thou Source connected realization on both of their parts.

Jonathan speaks about the true nature of reality and of the whole “cancer thing” from an atomic up to a macrocosmic scale, using parallels in nature and scaler dimensions of consciousness.(microcosm to macrocosm) He explains analogies in nature, in chemistry, biochemistry and physics. His experience of walking through the forest, grounding and communing with the trees is revelatory of how Source Love communicates through nature, and trees in particular are very good for this intuitive communication.

There is a huge difference between structure and source love intelligence of beingness that directs structure in nature. And our problems with disconnect from Source truth is due to the lies we are fed, traumas we endure and our society’s over emphasis on structure as opposed to Source Love.

When we wake up, we do realize the insanity of what is controlling the planet—this archontic “cancer consciousness” of separation from Love/Source/God.

Education—which is largely the matrix grid power control system, is a deceptive and seductive mind control system to encourage separation from Source and of Nature. It’s an overload of mind programming that can override ones heart and soul/Source intuition which needs no “memorization” or schooling. The separation mind-parasite programs of belief feed the “cancer consciousness” of non love. Once we can heal our “wounds of separation” that have occurred through trauma and connect with the intuitive nature of who we really are—then instantaneous healing can occur.

Even though this is a simple “understanding” that we can “get” on a conceptual level, to really BE IT is a rarity.

Healing from trauma takes a willingness and openness to face fears and uncomfortable emotions. It is directed  by the profundity of ones pain and is guided by the intention of Source Truth and Love. The mystery is how well one can “create the space” for quantum healing to take place. All I can say is that empathy and compassion must be present. And a strong desire and personal responsibility on the part of the person who wants healing must also be there. This is an important part of the healing and connection to Source process.

Being born into this world is like being thrown into a mean game of “pin the donkey”, except not only is one blindfolded and spun around, but we are shot at, lied to and tortured into conformity to “THE LIE” which constantly sends its vampiric tentacles out to lure us back into IT’S FALSE GAME of separation. Our internal guidance system of deep inner truth is what we need to reconnect to. Not outside authorities and systems of belief which keep entrapping us into believing science and rationality and “structure” is what it is all about. Nor is intuition defined by emotional triggers which set off false beliefs because of unresolved/unhealed traumas. Intuition is not about emotion, but can be arise with feelings and direct knowledge.

The guiding intelligence of LOVE itself and intuition can seem to be a mystery.

If you take time to listen to this entire talk, you may get alot of confirmation of your own intuition which cries out to be heard, and yet it can often get slammed shut by the programs and cancerous parasites of this world which constantly bite at your ankles.

Remember, you don’t need the approval of disconnected, archontic, infected minds. Let them be offended.

The game of Source Love is simple. Tag. You’re it!